For James Who Will Never Know He is a Poem


watermarked, purebred
we strung him in a net
curiously blue spring jacket
his body a twisting silver specimen
two fish eyes : bloody & bulged : bright
as diamonds or shiny like
two newly minted coins.

corrective lenses. 10:37 pm. canvas strap pinned beneath damp armpit. secured snugly inside
that curiously blue spring jacket. he wanted it you said. walked out of slabtown every night for it you said.
jabbed fingers into anonymous holes for it you said.

shirt white. button down, dingy.
hair chopped & whimsical
if i look at him sideways
corner of my eye
two seconds
blinking often
i could mistake him for
a young man
a young boy
maybe a boyish girl
but i don't look at him
don't see him
he doesn't exist

he exists.
someone called him james once
said they left what he was looking for
on the steps of the dental clinic once
someone said something about no parents
disability
residential living
molestation as a child
high IQ
sharp as a  fucking tack
once.

hot pockets. he might answer if you call him hot pockets you said. 10:43 pm. swollen traffic cops plunked neath 24 hr. open all night baked fresh subway lights. he's coming you said. voice quivering with anticipation & a want so bad. get ready you said. get ready to give it to him. jingle. your hips shift. hands full of something so bright. you're right. he does want it. he wants it so bad he walks 15 miles for it. he wants it so bad he patrols sidewalks for it. he wants it so bad he checks every glowing vending machine in town for it. he wants it so bad he even fondles payphones for it.

you give it to him
hard
from fifteen feet away
he scrambles, hands
scratching
asphalt
searching,
tucks those shiny jewels
into canvas bag, hidden
underneath that curiously blue
spring jacket.

you light a cigarette
look away

eyes swollen & proud.