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Afternoon Encounter of the Mystical Kind


I got a little glimpse of God three years back
she says.

Yeah,
I hid him underneath my raincoat
for stormy days
and months that begin in S.
But I've not seen any rain in weeks
and me and my friends are getting
a little restless inside this skin.

[ she folds the hem of a tattered plaid dress.
pulls the makings of a brown sweater around her shoulders.]

I think I'd like
to smoke this town.
Leave out in search
of something different.

[ pause. ]

But it's like
everything's the same,
you know?

The county seat might change
or the shape of the highway,
but there's corruption
on every street corner.
In every town, every town
there's always some married cop
parked in the silence of the backwoods
with his hand up under a little girl's dress.

[ head shakes quietly. side to side. down. ]

And then you've got your big wigs,
the 'social elite' [ those fingers ] in permanently pressed
slacks & never been picked cardigans,
too busy with the day to day
the nine to five
to even notice for a minute
the shape of the clouds.

And I can't stand not seeing goodness
in the eyes that pass.

[ head down again. quietly. ]

I can't stand a marred iris.

[ voice trails.  hand in sweater pocket fumbling. cigarette withdrawn. lit.
fingers fidgeting with the hem of her dress.  two streams. smoke. exhaled through nose. ]

Yeah, I know
I know.
That might not make a lot of sense
to you right now.

Maybe I'm different.
Maybe I'm just an old school kind of gal....a thinker.
But you've got goodness in your eyes,
I can tell.
You don't know it's there yet
but baby, one day
you'll encounter eyes so deep
a love so big
you'll swim in it instantly.
Hands that won't shake
when you reach out to touch
and eyelid.

You've got those on you.
You've got that internal glimmer.
I can see it.

[ nods head slowly. eyes narrow. ]

You don't believe in prophecy,
do you?

When I was a little thing, maybe 9 or so,
out of the blue this old lady
came up behind me, framed my face
with her hands. Started speaking.
She called it speaking in tongues.
Damn girl, I felt it vibrating
all the way to my bones.

I sat quiet as a mouse
with her hands on each cheek.
Didn't flinch a muscle.

[ again that head shake.  quiet.  slow. ]

Maybe I'm just a holy roller at heart,
but you wouldn't believe
how much energy radiated
from those 10 fingers, her palms...
and the sound of her high pitched prayer
lifting roof, cracking ceiling.

I'll never forget that.
And I think, hell I know...
a little bit of that energy
got trapped inside my hair that night.
I've been here
searching for it ever since.

[ head hangs.  strands of auburn mixed with streaks of silver, fall over left cheek. ]

You know,
there's a difference between being alone and lonely.
I've got sadness dripping from every limb
and eyes that bleed, I know that.
But baby, a little piece of understanding here and there
That's where the holy comes in. That's where it
accumulates, hides and grows

until a girl like you comes along
with goodness napping in the blue of her eyes
and a heart worn right on her sleeve.
Yeah, I can see it.
I know you all too well, darling.

[ she frames my face with her hands. thumbs tenderly cover my eyelids. ]

Your granny used to tell you something was after your soul.
Been after it for years.

You've got scars. Miles of scars on what was once a perfect skin.

You've seen ghosts roaming the woods at night.
Felt 'em. clinging to your back like molasses.

You know what it's like to wake up at 3 in the morning
listening to your six year old brother screaming
because his dead mama's standing at the foot of the bed.
There's was a time in your life, when your father's hand
was the only hand you wanted to hold. Thought you were
dying.

And baby you learned that get well cakes,
made by tiny fingers hoping, wanting to heal
don't tempt fate in the least.

Felt the stirrings of something other than yourself
crawl against your skin, you have.
You don't know exactly who you are yet,
but damn girl, you're trying to be.

[ thumbs uncover my eyelids.  hands leave wet face.  wiping as they go. ]

Girl I'm not going to lie to you.
This is not an easy life.
But I've got God saved under my raincoat
talk to random strangers about prophecy
and vision.  Crows that keep watch
without ever leaving the guardrail.

[ she winks. eyes roam knowingly to the edge of the blacktop
as she stands, adjusting her skirts. ]

But remember this...if nothing..nothing else.

Always search for eyes to swim in.
September skies ain't ever gonna keep you clean.
Trust what you know...right here in the pit.

[ pale hand covers my belly. ]

And God,
God is perched somewhere just around the ribcage, listening
for your openings and closings.
Remember that. Keep it for stormy days.

Winter's going to be a silent season this year.

[ tilts head toward sky. looking east.

And Fall,
Fall knows just exactly how
to break a girl.

[ she stumbles. glances over shoulder. hoists worn flannel bag against the small of her back.
and leaves. ]

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